Reading on the sofa, relaxed, thinking of driving to the beach late tonight for a long weekend, the last gasp of summer, I fell into a deep dreamy nap. I can recall nothing of the action, structure, or setting of the dream, other than that the setting was an amalgam of various real-life places from my past.
Waking from this nap, which was extremely deep and very short…the same Radiohead song was playing when I dropped off and when I woke up…was a curious experience. I was anchorless, unfixed, and undelineated. Until I opened my eyes I had no idea who or where I was. Once I saw the room I was in I knew who and where I was, of course, but odd that we transition so regularly through this state of consciousness without awareness that we rarely notice how interesting a moment it is. I regained awareness the way paper absorbs watercolors, there was a soft seep of knowledge into my mind. When we die do we have this murky directionless grasping moment and then think “oh yeah” once we realize where we are?